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| Gift in his made of figuring it out. |
you cry at night and sip on a glass of wine hoping that you wont remember him,and inevitably,you do.
I fell in love with someone half my shoe size but gave him all of me.
I was hoping that meeting up with other guys would make me forget about that ass who stung me deep. I met up with a cute,humble and super confident hunk!!! still a favorite of mine. I remember believing that nope! he aint the one! well he was perfect at all he did. He checked up on me every time. calls me endlessly! and calls me Nana( commonly a female name) which i hate! lol,well he makes it sounds so relevant! i guess i can say i really liked the candy. One person that makes me feel like I am his number one.
Question was,was i really over my ex? or was i way to in love and oblivious to the truth which i couldn't figure). I dint pay much attention to that. Just recently i got a call to showcase my first fashion range as a fashion design student at home (Upington). obviously very excited and started planning my trip. the very next day a favorite ex gave me a call telling me he wishes to visit me! This guy to me is special. He depicts perfection...yep! he is considerate,caring and a great fan of King Jesus. He kinda intimidates me just because he is so perfect. Wasn't s very difficult call to make..sure!! i wanna get over my ex,why not test the surface. I had invited him to visit!
I couldn't predict the future but his was the first time we had great chats,that lasted fr seconds and usually ends up in an argument! we argued liked cats and dogs and he started calling me selfish! selfishly so,i just protect my emotions and he treated me like Priska from Generations. he would flirt with other faggs in front of me,call me names and made me feel like an abandoned kitten.My bf then called me and said one powerful thing " Gift,you're crazy,dramatic,and super funny,but i wont want you to change for anyone,i like you perfectly the way you are" Flip!! couldn't believe that my pre-conceived of this ideal partner who treats me like crap(which i had allowed because people treat you the way you behave) this guy who i thought I am not good enough for. I had realized that Uncle perfect is a poor lil sad soul that goes around Africa,charms gay guys and makes them feel like their the only one that matters until he meets the next best thing,makes you feel like crap!! well,he actually is the sad one validating his insecurities and plays victim. He is prayed for indeed.
in the missed of it all i realized that I am not gonna allow my tears to win and allow my smile to take the crown because my newly found bf is amazingly great at making me happy!! i cant even remember how my ex sounds cos he really aint no factor! the recent ass is in my prayers. But im happy to call Siya my baby.Sad part is he called me the other day and told me that he has got piles!!! like really dude!! lol...still love him with all those kumbaya disorders :-)
We all have got seasons and yes,we brake hearts ,we love,we cry and our hearts get broken. There is no manual to a perfect relationship. Just be loyal and care,because when you care,you surely will ensure to not do any to hurt the other party. And yes,there is no way that the on who broke your heart could mend it. Its not another persons job to do so either. its honoring your emotions,cry,pray and hill. allow yourself space of self reflection,embracing the lesson and still firmly believe in love.
After a failed engagement,dated another half my shoe size who had cheated on me, met an amazing guy and thought an old ex could mend my broken heart and realized there after...we tend to believe we know what we want,in fact we don't,we do however know what we don't want,and i can confidently say,I don't want someone who does not see my worth,someone that makes me feel like their number two. I want my baby with piles,the one who calls me handsome,Nana,dramatic and super funny and adds" Do not change for anyone"
Do not run around looking for Mr Perfect, just be the best partner you could be possibly,one will know when your appreciated and that's when you don't complain about not being appreciated
Remember: Life is only over when you don't see that smile of yours :-)
follow me on twitter: @TheGivado
Facebook: Gift Phetogo Kgakgamatso Kgosierileng
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